Thankful

It's been a while since I posted. Life, ya know? There have been so many times I've thought that I needed to sit down and post, and every time, something pulled me in a different direction.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. It's a time when we all sit around and think of things that we are thankful for. This is my list.

Last month, we took part in the Chosen Race. Friends and Family members got up early on a Saturday morning to walk or run 10 miles to benefit our adoption. For this I am thankful. While that was an amazing thing to see, I saw something even more amazing while at the race. I saw beautiful families. Families in which adoption was normal. I saw a blond mom with three beautiful blond haired, blue eyed little girls, who were all in love with their adorable black little brother. I saw a family with a white mom, black dad and Asian little girl. There were numerous other families just like these. They weren't parents with their adopted children. They were families. It was amazing. I felt so at home around these complete strangers. This was the one place where these families didn't get asked who the baby that didn't look like them belonged to. I am thankful for the opportunity to meet and talk with other adoptive parents and adopted children. I am thankful that there are others in this world who can see past color when it comes to making a family.

I am thankful for the people who have donated to our adoption. Whether it was through the race, a gift, donation, or other ways, thank you.

I am thankful for my family. For my husband, who supports me, loves me, and understands me.

I am thankful for my daughter. Hannah teaches me something new every day. She is the most tenderhearted and kind little girl and I am so proud of her.

I am thankful for my parents. They made me who I am today.

I am thankful for my brother and his wife. Thank you for allowing me to spend a day each week loving on your beautiful baby boy.

I am thankful for my friends. We laugh until we cry, we also are there for each other no matter what.

This list could go on for ages. I know that I am blessed beyond measure. Thank you to everyone who reads this post. Thank you for taking time out of your day, even just a few minutes, to read about or journey. We are finishing up some final paperwork and the home study, in search of Whichever One Fits.

Hannah

One part of our Home Study paper work is to write our autobiographies. I decided that I'd do the same here so you, dear reader, can get to know us.
I'm starting with Hannah, because, well, she's the cutest!
Hannah turned 8 the end of July. I'm still coming to terms with the fact that she's growing up so fast!
Hannah is the baby I was told I'd never have. When I was 22 I was told I would probably never have children. Imagine our joy when we discovered we were pregnant! The day she was born was the most amazing day ever! Every day since I have thanked God that he blessed us with such an amazing little girl.
Words I'd use to describe Hannah are beautiful, hilarious, caring, tender hearted, and pink. Yes, PINK! When I was pregnant, I stated that I wasn't going to have "one of those little girls who is all about pink!" Oops! Her room is currently two different shades of pink, one with sparkles in the paint. Her closet looks like a pink explosion! We are slowly trying to escape the world of pink!
Hannah has a very tender heart. She can always tell when someone is sad and is the first to try to lift their spirits. She loves to give sweet hugs and hates it when people are mean.
She was the first person we talked to when we decided it was time to adopt. We asked her if she would like to be a big sister and she was immediately excited. We explained the adoption process as best we could to a then seven year old. She asks every day about her new brother or sister. She's even suggested names. While I appreciate the effort, I don't think we will be going with Ariel, Tiana, Cinderella or Rapunzel.
Hannah loves dancing and gymnastics. She just completed her sixth year dancing, and second year on the competition dance team. She amazes me every day. She's a little princess, loves girly things, but also loves to get grubby outside and play in the dirt! She has a cat named Daisy. Hannah is the only person in the family that Daisy likes. Seriously. I'm sure, given the chance, that cat would have me taken out, but she adores Hannah. Hannah also has a leopard gecko named Lucy. Lucy was adopted from a pet store. They wouldn't sell her because she is blind, so we took her home and hand feed her. Hannah also has a pet snake named Izzy. Izzy is an albino kingsnake and therefore pink. Yep, pink. Even her snake is pink! She loves animals and adventures.
Hannah has lofty goals in life. She wants to become a pediatric surgeon. She made that decision in kindergarten when she met our cousin, Kensi. Kensi came to visit us over Christmas when Hannah was in Kindergarten. Kensi was at St. Jude because she had a Wilm's Tumor, a type of childhood cancer. We were lucky enough to spend some time over Christmas break with Kensi, then again Mother's Day weekend of 2012. Sadly, Kensi was called to Heaven in June of 2012. Hannah was crushed. She decided that she wanted to help kids like Kensi. For the last two years, she has been adamant that she will become a pediatric surgeon, the only time she wavered was when we swam with dolphins and she considered becoming a dolphin trainer!
Every day with Hannah is an adventure. She keeps us laughing and not knowing what to expect next. She is most definitely the best thing in our lives and we thank God every day for her!

Chosen

Running With a Purpose

10 Lives * 10 Years * 10 Miles

 

Coming October 18th, 2014

Charlotte Motor Speedway, 5555 Concord Pkwy S, Concord NC

 

This fall, Chosen will bring a 10 mile race to the Charlotte Motor Speedway in remembrance of those we lost 10 years ago in a plane accident near Martinsville, Virginia. Chosen celebrates their legacy that lives on through the gift of adoption. Join us for this special event as we honor them by raising funds and awareness for adoptive families and orphans around the world. Register now & race for someone else’s victory!

 

 

 

We are forming a team for the Chosen Race in Charlotte this October. Put on by Chosen and partnering with the Hendricks family, the race is in memory of those 10 lives lost 10 years ago. The Chosen is a race benefiting adoptive families. Any registration fees or donations will go to our adoption agency from the ABBA Fund, in our name. Shaun is running the 10 mile race, Ann is walking and Hannah has signed up for the kid's race. Will you consider joining us? Whether you are a runner, walker, or child, our team needs you!



Invite your friends. Invite your family. Invite runners you know who are looking for the next fun race! If you can't join us at the race that day, consider sponsoring Shaun as he runs, or making a donation to the team.

Below is the link to register. On the second page, please select Team Whichever One Fits. This week only, the team who has the most people sign up will win what the race organizers are calling "significant bonus $$ towards their adoption."

If you have any questions, contact us or the race officials! We hope to see you in October!

 

To Sign Up:  http://www.athleteguild.com/running/charlotte-nc/2014-chosen-10-mile

Remember to select our team: Team Whichever One Fits

 

Thank you!



Real

There are some words I just don't care for. Phlegm. Diphthong. Real. Yes, real. Most people wouldn't add "real" to their list of disliked words. It seems odd, really, to almost hate such a plain, unassuming word. Real. The thing is, I really don't like it. In some cases, I'd even venture to say I hated it.
I've known that I was adopted forever. I never had one of those Jerry Springer-esque moments: "surprise, we aren't actually your parents!" I've always known, sometimes even forgot. It was never a big deal to me. I'm adopted...and?? Growing up in a small town in Ohio, everyone knew your business, sometimes even before you did. My being adopted wasn't a secret. It was, however, something kids thought they could use against me. One girl, my nemesis, who we will call "Kristie," decided to tell me that I wasn't a real kid because I was adopted. Being the ever more mature and sensible sixth grader, I proceeded to punch her in the face, because, after all, if I wasn't a real kid, it couldn't have really hurt to be punched by me. Apparently, I was real after all. When kids would be ugly, I could remind them that my parents choose me, theirs were stuck with them.
As I got older, people would react strangely. I'd say something in conversation and the look of shock and awe said it all. "Oh, I didn't know you were adopted!" Then I get asked THE question...the one every adopted person will be asked at some point in their life.  "Do you know your real parents?" My real parents, I'd ask. They would stutter for a second then say, "You know, your real parents." I'd take a deep breath, try to tone down the defensiveness in my voice, and then begin their education. My real parents, as you call them, live ten minutes down the road from me. My real mom stayed up with me when I was sick. She took me shoe shopping. She was in the delivery room when Hannah was born. My real father taught me to fish. He walked me down the aisle at our wedding, and likes his Chihuahua, Rita, almost as much as his kids! Real doesn't mean we share DNA. Real is being a family. My brother Adam was adopted from South Korea. He is my real brother. We fought just as much as biological siblings growing up. I also felt immensely protective of him when kids in our one stoplight town would make fun of him; calling him "flat face." I recall threatening to give one little boy a matching flat face if he picked on my brother again. Last month, he became a father, and I an aunt. I adore my real nephew.
When I get around to the meaning behind their question, the answer is yes. I know a few things about my biological parents. I know that he had glasses and is therefore the reason I have glasses (gee thanks for that genetic gift). I know her name, which, for obvious reasons, I will not use here. I know that they were in high school. My aunt went to school with her. She saw her a few years ago and learned that she is now married and has a daughter. I'm often asked how I feel about that. Truth be told, I'm happy for her. I am thankful that she was brave enough to give me up for adoption, knowing that she wasn't ready. I'm happy that she was able to have a family of her own. I do not, however, feel the need to meet her. I respect her privacy, as I hope she respects mine.
Sometimes you can tell if a person is adopted. My brother in law, Nickalas is black. My in-laws are not. Adam is Korean, my parents, not so much. I happen to look a lot like my mom. Just lucky I guess.  Adoption does leave a mark on kids. You can't see it, it's deep inside. It's knowing that you were loved enough for someone to put your needs above their own wants. It's knowing that you were wanted, prayed for, and your arrival was celebrated. That's what's real.

The First Step

We are Ann, Shaun and Hannah Lee and God has called us to add to our family through adoption.
Meriam-Webster defines adoption as taking the child of other parents legally as your own. While that may be the legal, literal definition, we see it as bringing one of God's children into our family.
Adoption isn't a foreign idea for us. It's a way of life. Ann is adopted, as is her younger brother, Adam, and two cousins. Shaun has an adopted younger brother. We see first hand that genetics isn't the only thing that makes a family. All adoption stories are different. Ann was adopted domestically through a private adoption. Adam from South Korea. Shaun's brother was adopted out of the foster care system. Each road has it's pros and cons, but each so worth it.
After prayerful consideration, we have decided to follow the road to adopt a domestic infant. Our first instinct was to adopt internationally. We know that the need overseas is great and there are millions of orphans needing a home. One day, we may return to this road. We attended an informational meeting at our adoption agency fully intending to join the international program. After the opening remarks, the group was split into domestic and international sessions. Shaun stood to go to the international information session and looked back at me. When I say it's a "God thing," that's just what I mean. I felt like I was being told to stay and listen to the domestic adoption information. It wasn't our plan, but I sent Shaun to the international meeting and stayed to listen to the domestic information. Doris, the head of the agency began by telling us their goal. "We aren't here to find you children. We are here to find parents for the children God has entrusted us with." That stuck with me. Who was I to tell God what child we wanted or where this child would be from. If God has called us to adopt, he will lead us down the road he chooses. So, there I sat. Listening to the information about domestic adoption. Something I was too afraid to even consider before. Hearing terms like "open adoption," "closed adoption," "birth mother's rights," "legal risk adoption." My stomach was in knots. I'd seen too many horror stories about a birth parent taking the child back, away from the adoptive parents. I knew that international adoption didn't carry those risks. I was letting my fear dictate what I thought I wanted, instead of letting God lead me. The deciding factor that night was when Doris told us that they had two infants that were going to have to go to foster homes because they didn't have anyone to adopt them yet because they weren't white. I was amazed. Who cares if they aren't white? They are God's children in need of a family. We were then told how North Carolina ranks fifth in the nation for adoptions and the need for adoptive families for minority children is growing daily. I thought of my family. Adam is Asian, Shaun's brother, Nickalas, is black. That doesn't make them less of a sibling. That was the moment I closed my eyes and asked God to direct us. For the first time since the meeting began, I had a peace about it. I knew that we had to put our complete faith in God to lead us through this process.
It's not an easy or inexpensive process. We are currently saving to be able to pay for the homestudy. Once the homestudy is competed, we will be able to apply for grants and adoption loans.  We are also working on some fundraisers which I will detail more in a later post. I have began selling Jamberry nail wraps as a way to add to our adoption fund, and we are putting together a team for the Chosen Marathon in October.
Please pray for us! Pray that we follow God's will in every step of our journey. Pray that we can raise the money to pay for the homestudy. Pray that once that is completed, we can raise the money for the remainder of the adoption fees.